… it's broken

… you won't close the deal

… your forms are too long

… you block the user's path

… it doesn’t work on mobile

… you leave visitors hanging

… I don’t know what you want me to do

… it asks for too much, too soon

… your form fields are a labyrinthine nightmare

… your navigation is overwhelming

… it only works for some people

… it looks just like everyone else's

… it won't sit still

… it's illegible

… it doesn't work with adblock

… it's slow

… it asks unnecessary questions

… it's trying to impress me

… it's too consistent

… I don't even know what you're selling

… it doesn't tell me what I'm getting

… you won't show me the goods

… you won't stop bragging

… it's a bamboozle

… it's cold and unfeeling

… it's for everybody

… it's written for a robot

… it's inordinately circumlocutory

… it's lying to me

… it wants to be a movie